By Billy Felo
Many of you may know me personally but might not know the story of my baseball career. So, here is the condensed version.
After being a pitcher and third basemen at Chesapeake College (Wye Mills, MD) for two years, I transferred to Kutztown University as a relief pitcher.
Pitching in postseason Conference and Regional games, I helped the team advance to the Regional championship my Junior year and was the closing pitcher as a Senior.
After college, I thought my baseball career was over. For a week or two after being eliminated from the Conference tournament and not receiving a Regional bid, my sole activities were drinking heavily, crying and being sad that it was all over.
After the initial shock wore off, I began life as a college graduate and started looking for writing jobs. I played Twilight baseball every summer and had some of the best times with friends and teammates winning a few Twilight championships and drinking a lot of beer.
When I was 26, my college girlfriend left me, and I still couldn’t find a full-time writing position. My friend and former Kutztown teammate, Gilbert Vega, wanted us both to play baseball in Puerto Rico for a month.
So, I used one of my favorite sayings at the time, said, “fuck it,” and we flew to Puerto Rico to play in the Puerto Rico Instructional Baseball League (PRIBL).
I thoroughly enjoyed this baseball experience and fell in love with the island of Puerto Rico. Turns out, I spent as much time partying as I did playing baseball.
After Puerto Rico, I got invited to tryout at the Empire Pro League a few months later. I tried out and made a team. In my first season of pro ball, I pitched well and was one of the most effective starting pitchers in the league.
The following season I got invited to try out for the Napa Silverados in the Pacific Association (Napa, CA). Again, I made the team and earned a role as a starting pitcher.
I did not pitch well in the beginning but steadily improved as the season progressed.
The following year, I went back to Napa as a player/pitching coach. This was one of the best summers of my life. I pitched well, we won our first playoff game and I made friends that will hopefully last a lifetime.
The next year was 2020, and all baseball ceased as the Pandemic hit. This was the first summer in my life since tee-ball that I didn’t play baseball.
Then, in the Fall of 2020, the Empire League was offering a one-month pro league in Washington, PA. So, I went to Washington and tried to pitch like I always had.
However, something was wrong with my shoulder, and it was really hurting me. After spending a few days at the tryout camp, I went home to try and heal my shoulder.
This injury led me to not pitching or playing competitive baseball since my last season in Napa in 2019.
The above is a glimpse of my baseball story. For more about this journey, read my blog post, “Baseball’s Greater Impact,” at https://wordpress.com/post/masterfulmechanicsblog.wordpress.com/102
Included below are eight important lessons that I learned from not playing baseball after being injured in 2019.
1. There’s WAY more to life than playing baseball.
Life is so good, and playing sports is just one avenue for passion. My break from baseball allowed me newfound free time to spend on other important areas of my life.
As a new dad, I had no idea what I was doing, but spending time with my daughter allowed me the experience and her the personal time we both needed (turns out I needed this personal time just as much as her).
I also began writing more and exploring other hobbies that I had neglected. Fishing, hiking and camping brought me joy and peace in a world of chaos.
This hiatus also allowed me more time to focus on growing my business, Masterful Mechanics Baseball. Creating content for YouTube, writing eBooks and blog posts, joining the Mid-State Mavericks travel baseball organization and hosting more classes and camps have helped MMB slowly reach a larger audience.
2. Adversity is a gift.
It took me a little over 30 years to realize that adversity is necessary for growth and was the best time to learn about myself.
Everyone goes through tough times, but I didn’t understand the gravity of my response to adversity until I went through it.
My whole life before this, I despised failing, losing and coming up short. My response to failure was to put my head down and work harder through it.
Now, I’m finally understanding that adversity is an opportunity to find out what went wrong by listening to what the Universe is trying to tell me.
I still don’t like to fail or lose in anything, but I am able to do so much more graciously now.
3. I don’t have to identify as an athlete to be my most confident self.
How was I going to identify now that I wasn’t an athlete?
Not being able to play baseball might seem like a minor roadblock to most, but to me it was devastating.
Really being okay with not playing was a huge step in my evolution. It took almost three years of not playing competitively to finally be at peace with life outside of athletics. It is something I am still working on today.
Most of my confidence came from knowing that I was pretty damn good at baseball. So, when that vanished, my confidence went with it.
Even though I had other skills besides playing baseball, it was a challenge to recover my confidence. Working towards self-improvement in other areas helped me to slowly rekindle being my most confident self.
Also, knowing that I was making a positive impact on others through Masterful Mechanics Baseball restored my purpose.
While I know it is not necessary to identify as anything to be a worthy human, roles like dad, coach and friend are ones that I have leaned on.
3. I learned to enjoy life’s little blessings.
A falling leaf, a baby bunny and the beauty of fresh snow. I didn’t appreciate these small natural wonders until I had more time to pay attention to them.
At first, it was tough to keep myself busy with no baseball to practice on play. After some time, I learned to be content just sitting in stillness.
Stillness and silence help us quiet our minds, so we can tune in to what the Universe is trying to bless us with. Sitting in nature and simply observing the sights, sounds and smells opened me up spiritually and helped me tune into my intuition.
Strengthening my intuition was a byproduct of the stillness, but the true gift was my return of wonder. Enjoying simple things like birds singing, clouds passing and seeing turtles by the pond made me feel like a kid again.
4. I learned how to listen to my body.
During my Sophomore year in college, I started to train hard in the weight room. While I always worked hard at baseball, I didn’t focus much on strength and conditioning until my second year at Chesapeake College.
During this time, I was lifting weights and/or running six or seven days a week. This continued through my transfer to Kutztown University and during my time playing professional baseball.
Once I started having back and shoulder pain for the first time in my life, I realized I was getting older and needed to adjust the type of training and how often I was working out.
This allowed me to learn how my body was changing and what it now needed to perform at my peak. I began taking more recovery days and changing the type of training I was doing.
For the first time ever, I was tuning in to what my body was telling me and listening to it. I took rest when I felt overworked, and I trained when my body was craving movement.
This ability to listen to my body has now helped me to live a more robust life off the baseball field.
5. I’m an adrenaline junkie.
Striking out the last hitter to close the game, and the crowd goes wild. These were moments I lived for as a pitcher.
The high I got from this adrenaline rush was addictive, and it is one of the things I miss most about playing the game. Looking back, I realize how much I yearned for this adrenaline.
This is one of the reasons I’ve been trying so hard and for so long to get back to pitching.
Now, I try to get this jolt from other areas of my life. Skiing down a black diamond, seeing an unforgettable concert, public speaking and coaching are ways for me to experience a similar rush.
While nothing will give me that same feeling as striking out the side, I am learning that life as an adrenaline junkie is acceptable in moderation.
6. I can appreciate baseball from a different angle.
Coaching baseball provides me with two things I love: being on a baseball diamond and teaching the youth.
The game looks and feels a lot different as a coach compared to being a player.
As a coach, it is necessary to think about the game a few pitches and/or innings ahead. While playing, I was simply in the moment and giving my all every pitch.
It’s an interesting challenge to play the role of coach, but at the level I’m at, it is way less stressful than playing.
Coaching also allows me to work with kids and teach the game of life through baseball. Sports, especially baseball, are a vehicle to learning about life and how to be a good person. Challenges like dealing with failure, keeping emotions in check and being a good teammate are all experienced through baseball.
Using my knowledge and experience as a player, I hope to keep improving as a coach and to positively impact the lives of our youth through coaching the game I love.
7. I learned to seek improvement in all areas of life.
Lifting weights, cardiovascular training, stretching, long toss, bullpens, working on pickoff moves, practicing with the team, band work, soft tissue work with the trainer and being at the field for seven to eight hours daily for batting practice, team meetings, the game and the post-game meal.
This is the life of a professional pitcher, and as you can imagine, I did not have much time for anything besides baseball. During the season, it was all baseball all the time (with some partying sprinkled in as well).
During my break from the game, I first had to figure out how I was going to constructively spend all this new free time.
So, I started a journey that I will be on for the rest of my life. I was now seeking improvement in all areas of life. This included nutrition, strength/mobility, mental health, spiritual well-being, breathwork and strengthening positive relationships with family and friends.
Without my new goals and routines, I would have been lost. It would have been easy to just watch TV, drink alcohol and party all the time. Back in my college years, that’s what I probably would have done.
Luckily, my break from baseball came when I was somewhat older and wiser. As all things in life, I now realize that it came at the perfect time. While I was trying my best to figure out life as a professional pitcher, I respect the path I am currently on much more.
When one door closes, many more will surely open. The trick is to be receptive enough to understand what the Universe is trying to tell us.
8. I can get through anything that life throws at me.
I truly believe that my shoulder injury and forced pause from playing baseball was the best thing that could have ever happened to me. Two or three years ago, there’s no way I would have thought this, but this is the evolution that has transpired.
I know most athletes struggle when they first retire from the sport they played their entire lives. It is literally a shock to the system, both mentally and physically, and it is hard to navigate life without sport when that life is all you knew.
Not being able to play baseball for consecutive seasons was the toughest thing that I have gone through mentally thus far. It affected me daily and threw off my routines, confidence and personal fulfillment.
It was difficult to get through this mentally, and I had to work hard daily to accept life as it was. The longer I went without playing, the more I got used to it. By finding joy in other areas of life, I was able to slowly find purpose again.
Now that I got through this and came out stronger, I know I can push past the next curveball that life throws at me.
I hope this passage helps athletes work through their own tough times when they inevitably retire from their sport. We must have faith that everything happens for a reason and for a greater purpose.
Even if it doesn’t seem like it at the moment (ESPECIALLY when it doesn’t), I want you to know that greater things are to come.
Just like the caterpillar is thrust into solid darkness before it goes through its own metamorphosis, the dark times we all experience are preparing us for the beauty and light of the life we were created to thrive in.